i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Randomize
