You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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