he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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