I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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