just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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