No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
