I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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