Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Randomize
