I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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