i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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