Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
i think i just lost a toe
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
