they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
