Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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