bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Randomize
