I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I party with great urgency now.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
