My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize