she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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