I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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