Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
We have started to decorate penises.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Randomize