You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
