Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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