Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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