Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
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No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?