so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Need sex. Gaining weight.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize