You smell like stripper and shame
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
i think my cat just said my name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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