i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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