There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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