Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
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Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
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Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
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