ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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