No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
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