Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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