Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
