Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
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