I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize