college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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