just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
