Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
