So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
