In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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