My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
birth control should be required to get into college
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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