his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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