well I can't set my house on fire every night
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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