So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
