This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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