New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
My feet surprised me
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