we were pretty classy up until the second keg
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
