You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
