his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
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I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
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It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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