Whod you bang
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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