His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
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He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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