My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
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